For about two years now I have been doing an informal experiment. It is teaching me about all of us: even me.
This note is primarily to Muslims although if anyone else wants to opine one way or the other way they are welcome to do so.
I will be dealing primarily with IDEAS and not with dress itself, because there are still places in the Amazon where shaving half the hair off your head and painting your forehead red is lovely although we would not think so where I live and many other places where people practice things we would think are ugly so this is not about make up and mini-skirts this is about IDEAS. The ideas just happen to present themselves in the way I understand them. If I was from the Amazon no doubt I would present them in a different way.
Now…from the macro to the microcosm…
Two years ago a brother asked me to take all my photos down and I did. It was pretty amazing what happened. Not only did the annoying marriage propositions die away BUT SO DID ALL THE ACTIVITY I NEEDED TO HAVE A SOCIAL LIFE!
I started looking at what girls who could not use their photos did: dolls, Disney stuff, movie stars etc. OK it wasn’t their face but it was EYE CANDY! Same goes for the guys. If you are my friend and you are a guy don’t think for ONE SECOND I NEVER ‘check you out.’ If you think females are dead and holy because of a hijab you are sadly mistaken.
All of us who slam up our physiognomies for the world to see know what we are doing it is just a matter of WHY.
If I thought I would get as much attention if all anyone ever saw on my profile were birds and mountains that would be all that was there.
After that brother said to take all my photos down and I did that I put them back up one day when he wanted me to talk to a non hijabi Barbie for him and I was thinking to myself, “Why am I bothering to be good if he is looking at the hot stuff?”
As I got to stalking profiles I was assured that men and women both were looking at the ‘hot stuff’. Ok we are talking ISLAM here so ‘hot stuff’ might have three pounds of mascara and red lip stick WITH a hijab. As I got into the experiment more it became clear that there were whole web sites devoted to ‘how to look sexy in a hijab’ TRUST ME THEY EXIST!’ They exist so sisters can compete with the Barbie girls without uncovering.
I saw a meme once about a gal without a hijab who was like a lolly covered with flies and a gal with one who was respected (and lonely as all get out to!)
Anyway I tested that theory and I found that the most online attention I ever got in my entire computer career was as a made up hijabi and that NOBODY CARED what I looked like or what I did if I went ‘au natural’.
People who say they like to be ignored and mean it are pretty rare.
Then I began subtle experiments with various things that have come to this 365 app for your phone.
After making several ‘normal’ looking doll photos of me I decided to put up a garish blue haired me to see what would happen.
Bottom line is that LOOKS MATTER. People who say they don’t LIE. They even matter to really holy people and if they don’t matter to someone that one is as rare and fine as iridium on earth.