He walked next to the far away daughter. He could not touch her as long as she lived in their world. They had driven her to madness. Why he cared was beyond him. She had chosen to spend this time as a human, before leaving his world. Walking with her he found himself understanding the differences in the concept of time. How that tiny slice of time she would live in was forever. It made his own forever also seem short. He never bothered to think about time until she left to be born into their world. At first he was very angry. He did not care how much she was tormented or what it did to her but now…the desolation and she still smiled?
He hid his form in the branches of the trees. He watched her collect feathers. With a sense of mercy he asked all the birds present to drop feathers for her to find. In Nature she had learned the meanings of Pain, Life, Death and what it felt like for a creature to take it’s last breath in her hands. He tried to teach her everything he knew but the harder he tried the more blasted her mind became. He possessed everyone around her. He loved her too much for just a daughter.
Maybe that was why she left?
Why was it that what was only a day in his world seem to last the eternity she now felt in hers…the eternity that was growing shorter.
Her grandmother hid all these centuries.
He hung his head in shame.
The man who was her father was only a man yet, when possessed by himself, turned into the madman that had to teach her these things. He saw the world through human eyes. He dropped to the ground sobbing. He asked again and again the Master of Creation to please speak to him but there was no Word, as there had been in the Beginning.
The horrible sin of his thoughts translated itself to all present and yet she seemed impervious to everything no matter how evil it was she responded as a child responds…always as a child. She never knew how much the man she called ‘papa’ loved her or why it frustrated him so much to feel the same things…
…people called him evil. He must be evil.
“Who is crying? It is raining and it is warm so someone must be crying.”
He was very quiet then. Containing all the sobs until his throat hurt. The sunlight dotted her small face with gold that matched her curly hair and sky blue eyes. That serious little face that had stopped smiling. The one that stopped hearing all the things around her and could make people disappear into nothing. He could ‘see’ her mind. It was so much like his own. How could this be when she had so little of the bloodline in her? How could she know these things?
“If you want some feathers you can have them. They are soft and pretty. Look at them.”
There they were, cupped in her hands while she looked up into the tree directly at him with human eyes that could not see him. The feathers of blue and white, red, and yellow-gold.
“You don’t have to cry.”
He almost said something back to her before he realized she would not hear a word but only see the images he spoke. He watched a woman come and lead her away, back to the other human children. He watched them taunt her and make fun of her and she saw that she had retreated from them to the point that whatever she did had no bearing on what they did. No interaction nor any reason for it. He walked beside her while she became the wooden doll and the woman led her into the building and into the classroom. The feathers were now hidden under her shirt.